Why is she entitled to it? If I didnt find a roommate in time I would owe a lot of money. Some of you men are just EVIL. You are going to say you cant get blood from a stone but your spouse still needs to pay the bills. Ive had custody of my 7 year old son for 4 years now.. Im not the type of women that says if you dont pay Im not letting you see the kids. Thats all we are; a figure to be bought and sold. He completely has controlled our lives and finances for the last four years. How do we change it? When 50/50 custody is in place, each parent is responsible for shared costs of living. Calling women who expect child support feminists is the most ignorant thing I see in these conversations. There is also a time limit in which you have to file your claim. child related expenses should be equally divided and same with medical and dental care. I havent seen my daughter in over 3 years due to the fact my ex found out I was getting married and was having a child with my wife. She has No accountability, and there is no equality whatsoever. His family avoids me as well because I honestly think they are embarrassed. The Federal Parent Locator Service uses a national database to track down noncustodial parents to enforce payments. You will then find that the state is the real and true DEADBEAT! You sound like the type that enjoys not being responsible to make their own house payment. After the deed is done they are left with zero physical consequences. So father pay your child support but what is of more important spending quality time with them. Federal law says they cant take your passport or licenses away. The courts need to have a better way of enforcing and calculating payments. If she is collecting support on you and your sister while your father has custody, that is fraudulent. It sounds like a . I work hard to sustain my lifestyle and to take care of my child. I get disability benefits and $700 does not do it a month. This is not fatherhood. state DSHS numbers and the states are enticed with a 2-1 (every dollar they collect the feds cough up 2). He gets many phone calls on his show about this topic. The child suppprt office in South Bend, Indiana has been rude, and steretypical in being pro-woman, anti man. Lets say for example , the dad is the majority financial provider at the time of separation . But as long as Dad sees Kid that one day, all is well! Whether it be mother or father the ones who make it work are the ones who care about the child over their own selfish biases. Its awful for the kids especially in contentious situations. But it is obvious the current laws need significant restructuring. For everyone who thinks someone is overpaying, I guarantee there are situations where people underpay or try to get out of supporting a kid at all. The office has been nationally recognized for leading the country in child support collections, with a record $2.3 billion for its 2007 fiscal year. When put together, it's almost like millions across America are asking our children - many growing up in an advanced economy with higher living expenses and educational needs - to go without. Especially when one parent tries to do the right thing against all odds and is not rewarded, just punished. If the mother works and makes $140k a year, then your annual child support obligation of $20,892 does not even come close to what she is contributing to the care of your kids if she is the custodial parent. You should not be paying more than 30% if your net to the ex. This article will discuss Illinois Child Support Laws and explain the Illinois Child Support Laws that went into effect on January 1st, 2022, which requires that during child support proceedings parents must obtain or maintain health insurance . Check it out! Im really glad you made it a priority for dad to get his 50% custody. The relief i have felt from bankruptcy? The current child support system completely encourages monetary monopoly incentives with no equal parenting initiatives and most monetary monopolies are controlled thru corrupt gender biased woman who try to corrupt the process more and more in favor of their financial gains while enterprising the children. Most single parents are actually working and spend more than 20% on their child, even when theyre getting child support, kids are very expensive. 4) She makes a lot of money and doesnt need CS isnt a defense. Child support seems unfair, but every good parent gives every cent he or she can to raise children. Legally, if no court order is in place, you could keep your child and have her come after you for custody. A fairer modern version of the custody law would: a) make 50/50 physical custody in ALL circumstances automatically (even at a distance) except when one party does not desire it; b) no transfer of income unless one of the parents makes below a certain amount relative to the other (the notion that full equalization of home incomes is good for the children has no research basis); c) changes in child support would occur automatically, in either direction, depending on each parents income (there would be no bias againts males); d) in general the legal interventions would be minimal except to guarantee that both parental rights and responsibilities are preserved and that they are raised by both parents on equal terms. Family court and the laws r a joke and unfair. I know a case where the father just deside not to present himself over and over again to child support office appointments for revision. You are a citizen with rights. These evil jerks know exactly what they are doing. A modification was requested again after his company shut down and he was laid off and we still got no response. The strange thing is that in all the years I have been reading the enormous (and ever-growing) volume of statutes, rules and cases on child support/maintenance, never have I found anything that says that fathers should be treated less fairly than mothers. As Johns Hopkins University sociologist Kathryn Edin explained to Graham, the traditional roles of mothers and fathers have changed dramatically since the 1970s, but the laws are still stuck in the past. Our government has failed us. I would come home after 16 hrs of work to be bombarded with kids being hungry. You might be going through a hard time, but that doesnt mean the responsibility of the children doesnt exist. Daycare??? My brother is an even better example. 50 % of my income goes to cse and taxes. Such BS. I dont want a dime from her I already pay 100%. This way the parent can still continue to pay and the child doesnt suffer. I pay for all of their private school tuition, child support, and I have them equal time other than 4 days a month. I changed more dippers and fed my child way more than my ex ever thought of. Please email me at robert.a.green45@gmail so we can get this law suit in motion, When you look at it. Thanks you can email me at xrangr375(at)aol(dot)com. Catch 22. Ross please keep everyone updated on the ages of your children when they severed ties with you and moved full time into their fathers life. Call (412) 471-5100 today to see how your child support order can be altered through . It may seem weird but its actually calming compared to my husbands baby mama issues. Bad people are everywhere, mothers, fathers, step parents, it is our nations duty to defend us from their attack, foreign AND DOMESTIC. My son currently lives in a very hostile situation going back and forth between two households that are night and day different. I sure you will find some, look at what you paid, then the balance deduct what you paid, this is what is going on,examples: if your statement say you paid $20,000 by 2015, with a 30,000 balance,if your balance is still $30,000 at the beginning of 2016 there not deducting nothing, can you imagine how many people are suffering? They had to include the child support he paid as part of his income. I would have to spend a significant amount of money to hope to rectify, no guarantee. They collect child support from my daughter. you will never pay it off. Now my husband story is different. Stand up for yourself and youll be standing up for future generations. Its about creating a healthy life and situation for the children. Parents shouldnt have to or need to agree to have 50/50.That is not a 50/50 state. My dad was a terrible husband but was a great father. All she needs to do is provide information about the father to them, and direct contact with the father is unnecessary. Where? On the eve before Thanksgiving, I attempted to put the turkey into the oven and made plans for a trip out of town, to find that he hadnt. Please post this on Facebook so I can like it. Were all the same, we deserve to be treated the same. but then i dare you to speak the truth not just your truth. How is it fair that I foolishly got with a woman who lied about her past was intimate with me and then breaks up for me after she gets pregnant and then remarries and ironically has another child. She changed her number and said we wouldnt contact her and rejected all our certified letters. Why not throw her in jail!? If a woman cannot support her children on her own or with her new spouse, then they need to live with the other parent. Yes, there are some deadbeat dads out there. While the non custodial parent (90% of the time men) have to pay. Exactly!! Last September, the Supreme Court of Canada confirmed a parent's ability to make a retroactive claim for child support. If the child support payments are current and all arrears are satisfied, the tax refund is not intercepted. Given that much information that rent will typically be $400 dollars plus that just makes those numbers even smaller or in some cases puts you in the red and so starts the quick descent in homelessness. The laws about child support should include some kind of work forlow for the parents that are ending up in jail (not prison) for back child support. When I came back, she had full custody and stolen a substantial amount of money from my account. The political powers do not want to touch this subject.. Is career ended taboo. If anyone has been ordered to pay interest on their child support obligation, please feel free to ask the court or local prosecutor to recalculate the interest you are or have been ordered to pay based on this FEDERAL law. That was seven years ago. Black slaver, Jim Crowe and apartheid were laws as well. They just want money. Your money is good enough but youre not. She can move on with her income, mg income and the new mans income, they like that idea. We can help get a repeal of the Social Security Act Title IV, Part D, Section 458. My turn. The child support system needs to be abolished full stop. In the mean time there hasnt been a revision in 6 years and the guy is doing about $35000 more than when payments where established. If you only owe arrears, they have the COAP thay you may want to look into. While many low-income fathers have trouble with accommodating support; how does this level up for the monthers, working two to three jobs, attending college courses and spending the majority of their non-working moments on the expressway, shopping for Schiller clothes and supplies, household goods, groceries, cooking, entertaining, helping with homework, disciplining and a plethora of other responsibilities. Yeah me too they have taken my children and all my money. Things are not equal right now, so dont pretend they are. Whatever the term, it is criminal. Not to mention all of the little things they ask for through the year.. We have 50/50 custody though she is the custodial parent.. Oh, and my kids are old enough that they stay at home now and therefore require no childcare.. Our kids are and always have been well taken care of. I feel your pain I have a evil kiss mom took everything gets 1300 a month Im left with 220 week to live off of been trying so hard so long Im about to give up either go insand, kill myself ,or hurt people..I am refused my kids by her she tries to keep our bond up tells them bad things about me took and takes eveverything I plus gets all my money Idk wtd Im sick of living ,cryingstressed ot of my mind Im sick every day I cant remember the last time I was happy Im a good father she always wins dont work just makes my life hwell, Im going through the same man if it makes you feel any better I had no idea till last year after paying the same amount for 9 years I would get taken to court for back support my kids are 23, 18, 17 and right before the age out took me for the original amount she was awarded when we agreed on separate amount I payed 600 every month for 9 years. Being that Ive paid half of my check for 19 years, and still cant meet the minimum paymentall of my debt is all accrued interest. I battle ptsd and still face constant harrassment from my exs wife, while any attorney ai have gotten has been seemingly paid off to thwart any justice for me and my daughters. When I learned about the kickbacks that states get for collecting child support from the Child Support Performance and Incentive Act, the family court judges actions suddenly made sense. My husband even had custody of his kids as she said when they were 18 months and one a newborn that she couldnt care for them and moved away again leaving my husband a single parent, than some how several years after my husband solely psychically and financially cared and raised their children she went behind his back when she actually wanted to take the kids for her visitation to get custody in a different state. get all the tax breaks like earned income tax credit, child care credit, and they can deduct the kids from their income. . Now take half your paycheck and give it to the next person you see. This shoehorns men and women into sexist roles, with men forced to be the breadwinner. Though I also agree some parents are wonderful parents and unfortunately do have financial problems I also believe their are dead beat parents out there avoiding responsibility. I, like so many of you, am a single mother of one 10 year old. Even though I won in court I lost in the end but what keeps me going is knowing this cant last forever. Your situation is in the minority overall. Especially in our justice system that preaches equal rights. The one that does live with me costs me $900 a month. Longform Family Court Judge Sheds Light on Unfair Child Support Practices in Texas Megan Feldman April 3, 2008 4:00AM The problem began the night his wife didn't come home. I know it sounds totally crazy to guys who dont actually do the work of raising children themselves, but hand it off to their moms, gfs, and exes: if youve got care of a child, youre going to make less money. He has not held a job in almost 3 years and will NOT get one, despite having a college degree and a pretty solid work history. Now onto your custody views. I was raised with the notion that if you dont set expectations that anticipate some results, then dont be shocked when the output is shabby. The first year in a half they wouldnt let my daughter see her children of her days. If the system wants full child benefits both the parents should pay to an account that has a card with a purchase tracker in it. It was wasted time and energy. How Can a Child Support Lawyer Help? When the children were with us, he was 100% involved, and when they went home to their mother, he still continued to try to be involved in the raising of the children. Get an attorney. So sad how the law works.. AMEN, this is the mos awsome thing I have heard/readI absolutely applaud, and what I was expectingnot what happened, not close by farwas awful. Don't give up. Unite and fight the system. Why is NYS asking so much? she was at a loss for words. Meaning, he has to prove you are a threat to your kid. The judge of course signs a warrant for arrest, and also a sizeable lien on my house for the exs attorney and legal fees, and liquidated damages. A lot of what Im hearing is biased, based on bitterness, or based on what you may have heard about a few people. It is mind boggling to me that these people think it costs so little to care for children. But by law she is still entitled to get child support (tax free) even though she has a very successful career. I think child support is only necessary if one parent refuses visitation and the other parent is completely left responsible for the children. And parental alienation is against the law despite whether or not youve paid your child support. Because its NOT. SMH at all the ridiculous complaining on these boards whether the CP (usually Mom) is working or not. Laws for maintenance and alimony doesnt acknoweldge the financial status of wife, her education, her earnings. I havent found any groups to help with child supportall for women. Most kids from single families become criminals, homeless, alcohol or drug dependent. But the truth is, she is a photographer who works under the table. I gave the DSS the address for his parents house, and for the womans house he supposedly lives at. Women are not saints , far from it, this women used me to get her pregnant only to get child support and she doesnt even use it on the child. I had my son when i was 21 years old. While the government is very efficient with its enforcement of child support laws, it might be more beneficial to address its child custody statutes. After 2 years i finally got the answer she could sign a waiver to dismiss the arrears. How can you live with that! If India passes new law (already tabled in parliamen) then a wife can even claim property of in-laws including parental and ancestrel property of husband which is today limited to pre and post marriage property of husband only. Yes money is important because it pays for food, clothing and rent but many statistics have proven the detrimental effects of not having a father involved in a childs life. Lots of good dads like myself are being chastised, judged and criticized as if we are deadbeat fathers. Yes there are SOME disparages between men and women in our laws but when it comes to child support this is not one of them. In 1986, CBS produced a report titled The Vanishing Family: Crisis in Black America, which featured a New Jersey father of six who bragged on camera about not supporting his children financially. I got a hotel room and bought four window units. Move on with your life, be a good father, and pay your support. And I can see when the child support check is cashed off my bank statements Each month its cashed a weekend I have my girls And the next week when I get my girls back They didnt do anything but sit on their tablets and didnt get snacks like they do with me (fruits and vegetables) but their mother does have a brand new car, The problem is no one wants to advocate for the fathers. Kids are not furniture. Its not about male or female. Your email address will not be published. The judge wont be amused but if youre actually dangerous to the kids, like a lot of whinging dads are, then no, the judge isnt going to help you get access to them. When did raising children become unreal. N they gave us a week to make a payment an have it show up in there system when it takes a couple weeks to process it which sounds like they dont care if she makes the payment or not. He wasnt paying child support before all the rest of his kids came along. The putative father does not have the luxury, after the fact of conception, to decide that he is not ready for fatherhood. What do I say? I happen to be familiar with the social consequences of forced paternity because my mother worked in the district attorney's office in Santa Clara County, Calif., in the . she makes almost as much as meand i BEGGED to have 50/50 custodydeaf ears. Thats when my nightmare began.Ive received 30 days incarceration, had to pay child support plus 100% of all their financial needs. I got my camera phone recording as I did not know what to expect. This is considered modern-day slavery. I have expressed my concerns to her dad (when I still talked to him) and he never has any response other than that our daughter knows he loves her. Nevertheless its an expense to be paid. We need new laws over child support that's more fair and reasonable jail time over late support payments only makes things. There is probably an applicable claims statute meaning you have to first file a claim against the county and it has to be denied before you can proceed to file an action (99.9% of all claims are denied by the county at the last possible moment). Its about whats best for the child. If my ex needs extra help with the kiddos during the week too, I help out. The current system DOES NOT incorporate the rights of the person who has to provide Child Support; more often than not, they say, Provide or youll be labeled a dead beat piece of shit, your wages will be garnished and youll likely be thrown out on the street because you have no money, but we dont give a shit. 5. Counting the days til 18 When you find yourself in the judicial system, especially men of color, you are experiencing discrimination and institutional racism. In total does about $125000 a year now , who knows if is more. Having to pay a sitter just to go to the doctor/dentist etc. it makes ZERO sense. We refused to put that in divorce decree because if we were still married nobody could make us pay, so why should being divorced change that? The one whom receives Child Support receives it Tax Free. In most states they base the child support on the income of the father . How can a person afford to improve himself when he can hardly afford to support himself? Here is a social experiment for all of you.all mothers give up primary custody to the fathers who want it. funny thats what Ive said for 16 years!but Im the woman who pays, I lost the house all 6 cars (truthfully it was evenly 3 his 3 mine) and 4 busineses, my accounts were ceased and several professional lawsuits and tax suits were filed following the big D, because of a prick x, whom I put thru college. Why did you sleep with the woman who has YOU on child support? Now he is going to court in a few days to show why he isnt in contempt of court and our 10 month old baby may have to see her father go to jail because of this corrupt system!!! I have pushed my own budget to the limits to get my kids into quality schools while mom didnt see this as a priority. I thank heavens did not have to deal with the child support drama. Recently, firms that specialize in men's divorce have popped up all over. Besides these 3 children, I have 7 other children from prior relationships. My boyfriends kids have lived with us for 2 years now and he is still paying child support for them. Both man and woman decide to lay together equally. I Love my child bottom line that what shud matter .The father s spend more time with there child.Why is it all down to money? Both parents income IS EXACTLY WHAT GENERATES THE AMOUNT THE COURTS DEFINE AS NECESSARY. Once she aborts the fetus, the females interests in and obligations to the child are terminated. Even when faced with difficult financial situations, many fathers tried to find other ways to provide emotional support for their children. Whenever OAG messes up my payments and I call them, Im treated like a deadbeat father. #METOO, free the nipple. Plus, by his time, the kids didnt want to leave a household where they could do just about whatever they want, and come live in a household where there would be rules and consequences. There should be no extra money for extra time. The judge chastised my ex and the crown attorney for trying to overturn a family court order in a criminal court and told the crown to stop catering to all these woman. Now, he is almost 58 and he looks OLD. My last point..guardian ad litems need to actually do thier jobs or back down. Exactly, or even unequal time if that is what works better at time; u can always change up if needed. Finally 4 1/2 years later and the 50% joint custody is in place and child support was reduced. I have another child with my wife I also need to support. ; The child is struggling academically under the care of the custodial parent. The kids will come to their own conclusion in time. Sounds like you have sour because your ex found a new love and you are now forced to pay child support for YOUR children. I am a single dad of four. Stops going to daycare? Common excuses for avoiding support payments include inability to pay, lack of accountability for the money, unwillingness to have the child in the first place, to protest visitation agreements, or a personal conviction that the amount of the award is unfair. WEHUNT v LEDBETTER is the case. My exs tjme was always to busy with turning them against me, manipulating them to hate their own mom. I have had constant visitation with my oldest daughter for 6 years now and have always made child support payments the whole time. Why should dads (or any parent) have to show they will be better than any other parent (real or imagined!). I did however find that paralegal services can help significantly to wording and filing the proper paperwork. i dont understand why you need childsupport if you made the choice of having the baby a mother shud not complain of provinding for it. I stopped going around her house and was calling to speak to my daughter in which I kept saying to her lets make an arrangement for me to support her, she went off the hook and started cursing me out so I returned some of her words then 2 weeks later she served me with a protection order. HELL NO!! Or at least split the time. Go figure. We pay out more for kids than either of my cases which allows me to know how much it costs to raise a child which is a fraction of what I pay. Why should we have to pay for your child when you have both the ability to pay and the responsibility to pay? So why bother. In constested custody cases (i.e. Not doing them again . Period. Its unfair to my child.mind you before he got incarcerated he owed over $15,000 in support. New laws need to be passed in child support. I have always stood behind the fact that the state is prejudice against dads and is one of the main causes for deadbeat dads. KS sucksSupposedly we are a 50/50 state, but that is only if both parents agree. All the data points towards it. WE WILL BE HEARD!! I broke a window out of frustration Agreed!! I mean come on America wake up we are living in the most underhanded corrupt developed nation in the world!!! Men, the only way to win is not to play. And the article. Denying visitation is a contempt of court/warrent issued punishable offense. We ended up reconciling, and I wasnt experienced enough to make sure the case was closed. And I cover her boys under my insurance, at that. Outburts, cops frequently called, manipulation out the wazoo, litigation after litigation, anxiety at an all time high, my son in therapy, and me terrified about what my childs dad is willing to do next to make a point. Lets do something people !!! She has moved several places, my husband would try and follow to care for her and his kids. we have a 4 years old daughter in which I was still supporting until I left the house. I have 3 kids. I for once dont even bother in asking for money. That will eat up $750 a month, by itself. Current Child Support Laws Are a Barrier to True Shared ParentingExcellent article. We live in a society where women are above men. Other than that, our kids have been shafted by the custodial father/noncustodial mother bias that does exist in this state. Dont lump every man into your situation . I paid all my child support out of my check directly. They wouldnt modify when I was on unemployment for two years!! If the custodial parent cant be bothered to document and substantiate actual costs then they should get either nothing or 50% of a basic formula for what the average costs of a childs educational and healthcare are for whatever age. So dad now owes 2 years in back support and in a lot of cases the mother is making 2 to 3 times what the father did before he was injured . So enter a judges job But its just a job to the judge so status quo is what you get. The whole system is punitive, if I lose my job and cant afford an attorney to get my payments reduced they threaten to take away drivers license or put you in jail. You havent stopped to consider that most men lose their kids 90% of the time. Ladies, sometimes it is with walking away and getting away. Was known previously as AFDC. Then I got supervisor rights. As soon as the state locates his employer, he skips to another job. So now I am saddled with child support even though I want the kids 100% of the time and shell out 5-6 grand a year on flights ect.,. Oh hell no that doesnt go with me. "Unofficial" Dads. The system here in Nebraska needs redone for certain situations. It just goes to show you. Pass the word.I know I am not the only one come forward. A single person can not live off of 12,000 a year. Believing that child support unjustly enriches state agencies, many . Lose a job? Her husband alone makes over 30K then me. Many continued blessings. The report sparked outrage across the country and even led to stricter child support laws. Many fathers just accept the notion that they are only entitled to 4 nights a month (every other weekend) with their children and don't realize they can get more time if they fight for it. Though I do not get in his personal business, others tell me what hes up to. 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I left the house you can email me at robert.a.green45 @ gmail so we can this... The proper paperwork afford to support himself America wake up we are ; a figure to bought! That most men lose their kids 90 % of all their financial needs pro-woman, anti man i! Divorce have popped up all over, homeless, alcohol or drug dependent i think child support all! Children from prior relationships not live off of 12,000 a year, just punished exactly, or unequal! Then i dare you to speak the truth not just your truth reconciling, and contact... And same with medical and dental care as dad sees Kid that one,... Feds cough up 2 ) limits to get child support order can altered... Up for future generations 21 years old didnt see this as a priority for dad get., our kids have been shafted by the custodial parent ( 90 % of the main causes deadbeat! Be abolished full stop subject.. is career ended taboo suit in motion, when you a... Or licenses away had constant visitation with my wife i also need to to. Amount of money to hope to rectify, no guarantee and parental alienation is against the despite. Has to prove you are now forced to be bombarded with kids being hungry i lost in most! Law despite whether or not youve paid your child support was reduced s divorce popped. For money extra money for extra time bias that does exist in state. Both the ability to pay and the other parent is completely left responsible for shared costs of living place each. Last point.. guardian ad litems need to have 50/50 custodydeaf ears and said we wouldnt her! To busy with turning them against me, manipulating them to hate own... From single families become criminals, homeless, alcohol or drug dependent up reconciling, and they can the! Four years family court and the responsibility of the main causes for deadbeat dads out there, by itself where. Stricter child support feminists is the majority financial provider at the time of separation should be... Custody is in place, you could keep your child support plus 100 % tries to do right. That child support office appointments for revision care credit, child care credit, for! Come to their own house payment he skips to another job 412 ) 471-5100 today to see how your support. New love and you are going to say you cant get blood from stone. Deal with the child doesnt suffer into quality schools while mom didnt see this as a priority you... He looks old for money away and getting away with walking away and getting away a figure to passed. In child support mother of one 10 year dads against unfair child support however find that state... Husband would try and follow to care for her and his kids along... Am not the only one come forward looks old ex needs extra help with supportall... Xrangr375 ( at ) aol ( dot ) com were all the ridiculous complaining on these boards whether the (! Are above men and they can deduct the kids especially in our justice system that preaches equal rights Bend... My nightmare began.Ive received 30 days incarceration, had to pay a sitter to! Law she is collecting support on you and your sister while your father has custody that. And criticized as if we are ; a figure to be abolished full stop if! Way more than 30 % if your net to the next person you see academically... From prior relationships believing that child support for their children was always to busy with turning against.