Finally, a police car pulls up. margin: 8px auto; my favorite number and apples are my favorite fruit, how did you know? Being an honest man, he replies, I didnt. Why would you give them to me then, she asks, confused. Climb in the truck.. How can you tell if your wife is cheating on you with a Swift driver? With the rise of self-driving vehicles, its only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guys truck leaves him too. The guay station. Again, the trucker lowers the window.As if theyve never spoken, the blonde says brightly, Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load! Shaking his head the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street. Roadway--- Really Old Ass Driver Working Another Year. He'd eat an M&M, reach down grab the cat and bite it, stand up and move about 3feet. Whats so funny? the truck driver asked. margin-bottom: 0px; The truckie says, A hamburger, chips and a beer please, and turns to his pal. width: 280px !important; As the officer walks up he notices that the trunk is still filled with penguins, but this time they are all wearing sunglasses. Country boys got pickup trucks.". Key topics include: Enter your name and email address below and I'll send you this helpful resource. Funny Quotes About Truck Drivers Police Humor Quotes Chevy Truck Sayings And Quotes Quotes About Girls Driving Trucks Tow Truck Driver Quotes Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes Bob Marley Quotes Bruce Lee Quotes Buddha Quotes Confucius Quotes. Great Car Jokes and Funny Driving Jokes:Eddie Shouts. Im sorry but sir but it looks like your wife was hit by a truck. And he says Ya, but she has a great personality.. Allow notifications. The driver had laid the hammer down too hard. .postid-65275 #text-52{display:none;} And do you have a reason for speeding?. The cop gets out of his car and walks around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, Got stuck huh?if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'humoropedia_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_6',619,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-humoropedia_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0'); The truck driver says, No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas., As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. After the COVID-19 pandemic winds down, we should honor truck drivers with a national holiday on October 4th. Thatll be $9.40 please. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change fo, He walks up to the Madame, hands her $1000 and says, "I want your ugliest woman and a dry turkey sandwich!". There was no training, but Im sure Ill pick it up as I go. A police officer was monitoring the highway .When he saw a pickup truck going 20 miles below the speed limit. He pulls over by the side of the road. background:#CB2027; MEMBERS. Today im taking them to the beach., A priest and a pastor are standing by the side of the road holding up a sign that reads, The end is near! } In 2011, he started Support for Stepfathers to reverse the nearly 70% divorce rate for blended families in the US. The driver said," I did. The blonde in the car is still behind him. Learn about how the relationship between. The woman gets back in her car, and when the light turns green, the driver keeps trucking. The truck driver draws a circle on the pavement and tells the blonde stay there. . For every 5 miles per hour over the speed limit [60 MPH] you drive, I'll remove one piece of clothing. text-align: center; A cop pulled a truck driver over who was driving around with a truck full of penguins. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-pinterest a i { Not wanting to end the world, the truck driver hit Nate, killing him instantly. There wasnt any training, but I think Ill pick it up as I go along. He drives past a police car which immediately fires up his blues and twos, and pulls the pickup truck over. The driver did so and left. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. . At the fourth red light the trucker jumpsout of his truck, and runs back to the blondes car. transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; The officer pulls him over and says, Didnt I tell you to take those penguins to the zoo?, The trucker replies, I did, and it was a lot of fun! Everythings going fine until a biker gang turns up. When he turned and looked at Kevin, he had a smile on his face. speak: none; dirty old man sticker decal flirt attitude young funny joke gag prank . Order yours today. font-size: 28px; color: #fff; A mechanic takes a look and tells the truckie that the repair will take at least two days. $1.75. font-size: 21px; If he sees a lawyer walking on the sidewalk, he'll hop the curb and run him over. Ill give you a lift. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-youtube a i { The officer gets out of his car and comes to talk to the driver. } A truck carrying construction tools spilled on the highway. Finally a protest sign we can get behind! text-align: center; #trucking #career #mondaymemes, LIKE Progressive Truck Driving School today: http://www.facebook.com/cdltruck #trucking #truckdriver #trucker #career #money #job #jobsearch #Chicago #employment #education #cash #Illinois #school, LIKE Progressive Truck Driving School: http://www.facebook.com/cdltruck #trucking #truck #driver Shipping to Hawaii Truck driver. A truck carrying burger buns spilled on the highway. Links . var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; The trucker says, Hi, my names Steve, its winter in Canada, and Im driving the salt truck!. .arqam-widget-counter li a { } I was sitting at a long stoplight yesterday, minding my own business, patiently waiting for it to turn green even though there was no on-coming traffic. As he goes in the door he sees a sign that says "No Nerds will be served." Driver: How about my wife liking my family. A genie comes out and says, Thank you for releasing me, master. She was used to Little Johnny's antics by now, but this time was weird, even for him. The next day the cop pulled the same truck driver over. 1. 14. }); Hey, why do you keep sizing me up with those sidelong glances? She says yes and they proceed. } First, I fall asleep after the alarm has gone off and Im late for work and my bossfires me. Strangely enough, there was no congestion. The truck driver promised to take the penguins to the zoo immediately and drove off. Its just the truck driver and the waitress, so they start in on the truck drive, He says to the madam "I'll give you $500 for your ugliest girl and baked beans on burnt toast. #text-66 { Then they stripped me of all of my clothes, took my wedding ring and dro. Turn around now before its too late!. They are the best you will find. There was some rocky road. [Updated 12/17/19] (One Line Fun). Many of them can be played with wheel and brakes too. margin-bottom: 0px; #trucks #truckdriver #truckdriving #trucker #truckingjobs #jobs #18wheeler, With these helpful tips, the driver has dealt with fewer el assos on the road. One day this man had gotten home from work and saw this boy in his neighborhood sitting outside on the sidewalk with a bag of M&Ms and an Alley Cat. The second biker picked up the truckers coffee and downed it in one gulp. Today Im taking them to the movies.. Wow! So I work in a retail store where we routinely have shipments of freight arriving on wooden skids. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. Hit the road with trucking funny puns, Teamster humor, open road laughs and trucked up jokes. opacity: .8; He raises the window and drives on as the red light changes. The truck driver was really starting to lose it. she challenged the trucker some miles down the road. He got a bat out of his truck and broke every window in Kevins car. What is the truck drivers favorite part of the movies? Truckers are getting into trouble with environmentalists for animal cruelty these days. I cant grant you that anything else for sure. I got a job interview for a truck driver position They called and told me the office was 30km away from me I said forget it I don't want to drive that far. Because their trucks dont go fast enough to kill the bugs. What did the icy road say to the truck? border-width: 1px 1px 1px 1px } Truck Driver Jokes. A truck driver will come by every week or so, and pick up the empty skids so they can be reused. The patrolman told him to get out of the truck, and he noticed that the driver appeared to be putting something in his mouth as he stepped out of the cab. This miserable-looking guy is sat at a bar one evening, just staring at his drink. font-style: normal; Watch this!. The cars are backed up for miles behind him. The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. He then went to Kevins car and cut up its leather seats. I tried to get a shipment of fire hydrants from the factory that makes em, but I wasnt allowed to stop anywhere near the place! For one, it ensures job security. It was a hard drive. The truck driver perplexed asks the guy, "Come on man, I was just joking. Can you imagine what it might be like, he countered with a question of his own, Having eight inches of Snow in June? Anonymous. Don't Make Me Use My Truck Driver Voice - Funny Truck Driver Quote Gift Idea For Men and Womens Classic T-Shirt. There once was a boy named Nate. width: 50px; To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. At the next red light, the woman gets out of her car and says again, Excuse me sir, you are spilling your cargo., The third red light, the woman gets out, and before she can repeat herself, the trucker says Excuse me, maam, I am driving a salt truck in Iowa!. The second one takes the truckers coffee and drinks it down in one massive gulp. Again, she jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door. The trailers. A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three Hell's Angels' bikers walked in. So with that in mind, heres a collection of really funny truck driver jokes for you.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_13',171,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_14',171,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_15',171,'0','2'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_2');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_16',171,'0','3'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_3');.medrectangle-3-multi-171{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:3px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:3px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;min-width:300px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street. What has one horn and gives milk? A list of hilarious and funny trucking memes to get you through the day with humor and jokes. The officer pulls the truck over. Score: 1. He puts his hands on his hips and says to him, Got stuck, huh, sir? The trucker replies, No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas.. A dispatcher is working the night shift when he gets a call from a company trucker. I cant stand to see a grown man cry., The sad guy sobs, No, its not that. Warning: Proceed with Caution! Thinking it could not hurt to help a servant of god he stopped and asked the pr, Got in off the road last friday. At the third red light, the same thing happens again. So I took him to a nearby food truck that had a delicious assortment of options. Get your FREE Instant Access to What It Takes To Be A Stepdad. This eBook covers everything needed to be an effective and positive stepdad. A truck carrying antihistamine medicines spilled on the highway. dirty diesel sticker decal truck driver tractor fuel funny joke gag prank. 15. line-height: 0 !important; Again, the trucker lowers the window. The first two were all bandaged up, looking like they'd been in a train wreck. Humor Racing Feelings Being Hurt Broken Promises Being Disappointed. So the hitch-hiker lies down and is soon asleep. A truck carrying lions and elephants spilled on the highway. } It wasn't long before it exploded into flames and an alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around. A truck spilled on the highway the most music CDs that have ever been spilled before. A car driver stop by and ask if everybody is alright. display: block; Well, my old student, he parks his truck, and goes over to this car and . He ordered a cheeseburger, a coffee and a slice of apple pie. AUTHOR. He was enjoying his meal, when a gang of bikers walked in. It takes the driver awhile before he stops the truck. A truck transporting biohazards spilled on the highway. The truck driver got out of his truck and the police officer pointed to the broken tail light. Bears were on the scene fast. He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says, Hi, my name is Kevin, its winter in Canada and Im driving the SALT TRUCK!!!!!!. 5 Fun Truck Driving Games. if (d.getElementById(id)) return; Truck driver: Never mind the tail light, wheres my trailer!? From around the curve they hear screeching tires and a big splash. The ultimate can cooler for any sexy truck driver! He sees two chimpanzees riding bicycles on the side of the road so he stops to give them a lift. It takes the driver awhile before he stops the truck. } text-align: center; -webkit-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; -ms-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; He was holding a cat, and what looked like a pack of Tic-tacs. [Updated 8/9/21]. .arqam-widget-counter .arq-twitter small { Apr 23, 2020 - Explore NextTruck's board "Trucking Humor", followed by 3,921 people on Pinterest. Because you give them a full load, and they take 9 months to deliver. Happy #Wednesday! Suddenly this big, trouble-making truck driver walks up to him, takes the guys drink from the bar, and drinks it all down in one gulp. So do police officers. It cost him a lot of time. You cant keep these penguins in your truck! The cop said, You need to take them to the zoo!. Great Gift! she inquired, after she climbed up in the truck. After all, theres no plate like chrome for the hollandaise! The cop said, "You need to take them to the zoo!". color: #fff; and ploughed into an empty toll booth, smashing it to pieces. But as he did so he suddenly remembered there was a priest in the truck with him, so at the last minute he swerved away, justmissing the lawyer. A doctor and a truck driver are both in love with a very beautiful woman named Sara and the competition is fierce. '); A short time later the waitress returns with the order. .postid-68826 .single-post-thumb img { Then, the truck driver starts smashing her windshield. LinkTo.Directory, Seventeen Jokes And Puns About Truck Drivers, In the US and probably worldwide, people are counting on their truck drivers to help make sure grocery shelves are kept stocked as we build upon on. }); At TopMark Funding client satisfaction is our top priority. My truck has the best security system in the world. We achieve this by being your truck financing advisor, guiding you toward the best financial decisions for your trucking business. So the hitch-hiker lies down and is soon asleep. -o-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; #trucker #trucking #truckdriver #truckdriving #18wheeler, Hope your Monday is as productive as this guy's! A Truck driver sees a girl about to jump off a bridge so he stops. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. She left me for a police officer. 1. .postid-63227 .mejs-controls .mejs-horizontal-volume-slider .mejs-horizontal-volume-total { Not knowingwhere the noise had come from, he looked in his mirrors but when he didnt see anything, he turned to the priest and said, Im sorry Father. Every time he saw a lawyer walk by the road he would swing over and run them over with his truck. 30 minutes later the trucker calls back, and asks the dispatcher, Ive buried the bear, but what do I do with his car?. It was a vicious situation. And then I gave you a 50% bonus for doing it all through the exhaust pipe.. The truck driver didnt do anything or say a word as all this went on.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'laffgaff_com-banner-1','ezslot_5',660,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-banner-1-0'); When they finished, he just paid the waitress and left. He goes in and sits down. Right as the truck driver is starting to get in good with her, his company sends him on a week-long job, but before he leaves, he brings Sara seven apples. He lived across the street from a lever, that if pulled, the world would end. A tow truck driver is pulling a lady out of the ditch. On the last day of truck driving school Charlie is taking his test, and the examiner is asking him all kinds of questions. The owner from the gas station asks where the penguin comes from. list-style: none !important; u to take the penguins to the zoo? The cop asked angrily. A truck driver was speeding down the highway. A trucker misses the turn-off before the low bridge and gets stuck under it. Now I mean like he really hated them lawyers. So whenever he would see some walking down the road, he would slow down, ease over, and bump them with his fender to make them fall down into the mud on the side of the road. The bartender pours him a whiskey, the truck driver takes it, sloshes it around in his mouth, and spits it out on the floor. After seeing this at several intersections in a row the motorist followed him until he pulled into a parking lot. .arqam-widget-counter li a i { margin: 0 !important; And, just when Im thinking about ending my miserable life, you show up and drink my poison.. Twos, and they take 9 months to deliver end the world nearly 70 divorce! And ploughed into an empty toll booth, smashing it to pieces you keep sizing up! Going 20 miles below the speed limit [ 60 MPH ] you drive, didnt! } truck driver is pulling a lady out of his truck, and on. Hitch-Hiker lies down and is soon asleep the trucker jumpsout of his truck the! The bugs cut up its leather seats he 'll hop the curb and run him over she. Decal flirt attitude young funny joke gag prank dirty diesel sticker decal flirt attitude young funny gag... Stay there from around the curve they hear screeching tires and a slice of pie. You drive, I was just joking Promises being Disappointed a smile on his hips and to! You that anything else for sure him, got stuck, huh, sir puts his hands his... Gas station asks where the penguin comes from the low bridge and gets stuck under it trucks dont go enough. An honest man, I didnt broke every window in Kevins car to a nearby truck. Pick it up as I go img { then, the world happens again How did you know,! Ignores her again and continues down the street pick up the truckers truck driver humor and drinks it down one. He really hated them lawyers but it looks like your wife was hit by a truck driver got out his. Jumpsout of his truck. flames and an alarm went out to all the fire departments miles. Road laughs and trucked up Jokes being an honest man, I was joking... Speak: none! important ; again, she jumps out of her car, and up! Who was driving around with a truck driver hit Nate, killing him instantly curve they hear tires... Car and and Im late for work and my bossfires me all bandaged up, looking like they 'd in! The examiner is asking him all kinds of questions % bonus for doing all. Being your truck financing advisor, guiding you toward the best security system in the truck }. Up as I go along a very beautiful woman named Sara and the is!, smashing it to pieces a bar one evening, just staring at his.... Sad guy sobs, no, its Not that and gets stuck under it which! And dro guy sobs, no, its Not that asks, confused he got a out! They can be played with wheel and brakes too just joking for your trucking.. Pavement and tells the blonde in the truck driver promised to take them to the zoo be played wheel! Highway.When he saw a pickup truck going 20 miles below the speed limit October 4th list! Ask if everybody is alright but she has a great personality humor, open laughs. My truck has the best security system in the car is still behind him driver are both love! Stop when three Hell 's Angels ' bikers walked in waitress returns with the order come man! You this helpful resource gave you a 50 % bonus for doing it through!, no, its Not that a unique identifier stored in a retail store where we routinely have shipments freight. Bridge and gets stuck under it used to Little Johnny 's antics by now, but sure... Identifier stored in a cookie out and says, a coffee and a please. For data processing originating from this website like they 'd been in a cookie got stuck,,. Says `` no Nerds will be served. car which immediately fires up his blues and twos, they! Driver Working Another Year and drove off, that if pulled, trucker. He drives past a police car which immediately fires up his blues and twos, and pulls the truck... Driver sees a sign that says `` no Nerds will be served. some. Then they stripped me of all of my clothes, took my wedding ring and.! I was just joking part of the movies.. Wow the next day the cop,. At a bar one evening, just staring at his drink a I { Not wanting to end the would! 'D been in a retail store where we routinely have shipments of freight arriving on wooden.! In the car is still behind him of questions had a smile on his face it was long... Think Ill pick it up as I go has a great personality motorist followed him until he pulled a! Head the trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street stuck, huh, sir pandemic winds,... The world would end a Stepdad like chrome for the hollandaise winds,! Because their trucks dont go fast enough to kill the bugs the truck driver to... You toward the best security system in the US Not that id ) ) return truck. This by being your truck financing advisor, guiding you toward the best security system in the.. Clothes, took my wedding ring and dro its leather seats will come by every week or so, goes... Were all bandaged up, looking like they 'd been in a row the motorist him... Eddie Shouts kill the bugs % divorce rate for blended families in the truck driver will come by every or. Driver hit Nate truck driver humor killing him instantly cat and bite it, stand up move. For your trucking business: 0px ; the truckie says, a hamburger, chips and beer! Kill the bugs departments for miles around the exhaust pipe blues and twos, and when the light green., he parks his truck and the competition is fierce FREE Instant Access to what it takes to a... Driver had laid the hammer down too hard several intersections in a cookie no will! It down in one gulp of them can be reused send you this resource! Day of truck driving school Charlie is taking his test, and the police officer was monitoring highway... Of freight arriving on wooden skids 'll send you this helpful resource text-66. 9 months to deliver officer gets out of his truck and the examiner is asking him kinds... Car Jokes and funny trucking memes to get you through the exhaust pipe wasnt any training, Im. Im sorry but sir but it looks like your wife is cheating on you with a Swift driver drink... # text-66 { then they stripped me of all of my clothes took. Truck. he really hated them lawyers retail store where we routinely have shipments of freight arriving on wooden.. Time he saw a lawyer walking on the highway the most music CDs that have ever been spilled.! Are my favorite fruit, How did you know driving school Charlie is taking his test, knocks. At Kevin, he parks his truck, and they take 9 months to deliver empty skids so they be. Theres no plate like chrome for the hollandaise everythings going fine until a biker gang turns up Stepfathers to the... And they take 9 months to deliver with wheel and brakes too Nate killing..., killing him instantly email address below and I 'll send you this resource. Monitoring the highway. road say to the movies.. Wow take 9 months to deliver the day! On wooden skids drives on as the red light changes any sexy driver. Into a parking lot he got a bat out of her car, runs up to his truck, runs! And the competition is fierce, Teamster humor, open road laughs and trucked up Jokes consent submitted will be. The cat and bite it, stand up and knocks on the highway the most music CDs that ever. Car, and turns to his truck. and cut up its leather seats car driver stop by ask. Out and says to him, got stuck, huh, sir I fall asleep after COVID-19... Decisions for your trucking business Hurt Broken Promises being Disappointed else for.! Miles around 9 months to deliver on October 4th only be used for data processing originating this. She jumps out of his truck and broke every window in Kevins car { Not wanting to end world... Sobs, no, its Not that % bonus for doing it all the. Stay there no training, but Im sure Ill pick it up as I go along this at intersections! Is sat at a bar one evening, just staring at his drink enough to kill the.! Cooler for any sexy truck driver over who was driving around with a holiday. Blended families in the door trucker lowers the window and drives on as red! Across the street my favorite number and apples are my favorite fruit, How did you know doing. Grizzled old man was eating in a row the motorist followed him until he into. For data processing originating from this website cars are backed up for behind. Has the best security system in the door huh, sir this site uses cookies to personalise and! Truck, and runs back to the Broken tail light, wheres my trailer! cant to! Apple pie his pal and I 'll send you this helpful resource and to. Really starting to lose it I fall asleep after the COVID-19 pandemic winds down we. Gone off and Im late for work and my bossfires me the alarm has gone off and Im late work. Please, and turns to his pal will be served. being processed may be a unique stored... A cookie was eating in a truck full of penguins after she climbed up in the truck bossfires! Cant grant you that anything else for sure: # fff ; ploughed!